A Humble Legacy!
How do you measure whether someone is successful or not? Many people would say the person with a type “A” personality–the person who is action oriented and gets a lot done– is successful. Others look at the person who has the most following on social media or has all of the nice toys. I would venture to say that as I get older and find value in other things, success is measured in the influence you have. Influence doesn’t come from being loud or having all the right answers, but I believe it comes through humility.
Unfortunately, there is a misunderstanding of humility. Humility is not being a doormat or being invisible. In its explanation of humility, Yourdictionary.com says, “Humility is the quality of being humble and means putting the needs of another person before your own, and thinking of others before yourself. It also means not drawing attention to yourself, and it can mean acknowledging that you are not always right.” This is hard to do. I would say that I have not always gotten it right. Actually, it is a struggle that I have every day. Can you grow in humbleness?
Here are four activities that will help you grow into your legacy through being humble.
- Put others first – Here the golden rule applies. It is a sound foundational principle in life. Whether it is showing kindness to someone or giving information that will give a co-worker a leg up or helping someone through a challenge that has them stuck. Often by helping those that need it, they will at a later date help you along your journey. By putting others first, you will create a culture of giving and serving which exemplifies humbleness. Furthermore, nobody cares how much you know until they know how much you care!
- They listen – I mentioned last week that the value you gain and respect that others will give you grows when you take time to listen to others. Being humble is exemplified in listening because it shows that you care for them. It is not about dominating a conversation but rather about seeking to understand and deeply trying to hear what the other person is trying to communicate. Grow in this by being curious; ask questions, and then actively listen to the responses!
- Say thank you! – Showing appreciation is something that is missing today. A humble person will take the time to extend a word of thanks for a job well done or service performed well. Too often we are looking for the negative or things that are not up to our expectations. Seek to understand and know that everyone has a story; try to find something positive in what another is doing, and show appreciation by saying thank you!
- Ask for help – This is a tough one for me. Maybe it is just a male thing, but I am learning that I don’t always have all the right answers. Often there are other people that are smarter than I am. Being humble is acknowledging that I cannot, nor I will ever, know everything. I can learn something and become better. Listen and learn!
“Humility doesn’t mean to think of yourself less but to think of others first.”
I recently found an example of humility on the C.S. Lewis Foundation website. C.S. Lewis has been credited for saying, “Being humble doesn’t mean to think less of yourself, it actually means to think of yourself less.” However, C.S. Lewis never said that. The website could have overlooked this misinformation and not made a correction, but instead, they did make the correction. They said, “None of these quotes are written by C. S. Lewis.” (See the correction here.) Though the saying is good, the humility demonstrated in admitting wrong is greater. It is not a sign of weakness.
The misunderstandings of humbleness can cause you to get stuck, stuck in your identity and where you are going. Humility doesn’t mean to think of yourself less but to think of others first.
What other actions or attributes show humility?